7 Deadly Sins
by Gorram.Doll
Summary: Series of drabbles, named after each cardinal sin, based on the lives and reflections of the crew post-Miranda. Mal/River, Simon/Kaylee. Final chapter up, Mal and his GREED.
1. LUST

**AN: Okay, this here's a fresh new start for me, new try on things. Un-betaed, seeing as both Beta-Requests I sent before New Years' Eve weren't replied...  
Just to be clear on this, titles were somewhat ironical, since these chapters (drabbles, more like) were first written, and then while working around with titles and such decided to give these a try. May or may not fit well, your take.**

**That being said... DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but these ideas, inspired partly by 'The Meaning Of...' series. Joss Whedon is boss. Tried to keep these as canonical as possible.**

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**1/7· LUST****  
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River wonders what's in a heart that makes it beat so.

Sure, she knows all possible biological explanations, memorized all of Simon's textbooks before she was 12. None of them mentioned hearts could sing.

Simon's heartbeat's much too familiar, soothing. Goes a bit wooly whenever Kaylee's around, but the rhythm is still recognizable. Makes her happy, in a way, when he's happy. Should teach him how to keep his foot off his mouth, but Kaylee doesn't mind.

Kaylee's heartbeat's pretty and speaks for her, almost in tune with Serenity's low humming, except Serenity is a mother and Kaylee's not there yet. She likes, River likes, to curl up and listen to Serenity sometimes when all is calm.

Zoe's heartbeat used to be the strongest, but it's delayed some since Miranda. It's doubled, a tiny hummingbird, and she should probably let her know by now. Might give back some of the strength she needs, seeing as she's too frayed to realize it her own self.

Jayne is steady, firm. Only sped up considerably when facing Reavers and certain death, grows softer while writing letters to his biological family. Serenity's his chosen one... now, anyways. And he beats for both.

Inara's fading, slowly but surely. Doesn't let it show, much, a small fainting spell while coming up the catwalk, more makeup required to cover-up signs on her face, less appetite. Would break the others, if they knew. River's breaks a little for her.

She rests her head on the co-pilot chair, staring into Everything and Nothing at the same time, and even more.

The Captain flicks on some switches, only half-focused on what he's doing. He's almost as steady as Jayne, somewhat troubled. His would break the most if he knew, if Inara broke the news. She'd probably decide to leave before it became too obvious, keep them from the pain.

She, River, wonders about him. Would it stop beating, if Inara's did? Zoe's on its way, and she reminds herself let her know about the baby boy Wash with his eyes and her curls. Might give her reason to. Jayne tries not to let them, but Preacher Man had been his real friend.

River sighs, and it escapes her. She wishes her heart could sing sometimes, sing like Simon's and Kaylee's, so she wouldn't have to feel what they don't.

"Anything's matter, darlin'?" he asks over one shoulder. Cheeks flush, hair whips to cover her face. Mal turns towards her and smiles.

River's heart flutters.


	2. SLOTH

**AN: OK, so thank you all for those so-so-so kind reviews... I'll try my best not to disappoint. Though I'm thinking my Simon ended up with some River-ish sentences.  
DISCLAIMER: Own nothing, never have, never will. All of this is part of Joss Whedon's 'verse (well, the characters I mean).**  


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**2/7·SLOTH**

Simon thinks he might be missing something, amidst all his and Kaylee's joy.

River is faring better than he'd thought. She appreciates being kept busy. He's maybe neglecting his position, but there's been no need for stitching or any surgeries lately. And his own wound requires rest.

He's no psychologist, but he thinks he should be when he glances Zoe's way. Healing isn't restricted to one's body. River watches Zoe, too, and he watches her watch her, sometimes. Doesn't envy her one bit for all those secrets she gets to keep, all those she never asked for.  
But then there's Kaylee, Kaylee, Kaylee.

It's easy to get lost, much too. And Kaylee, Kaylee, Kaylee.

Jayne keeps to himself, but it's different. Inara fights to keep up appearances where nothing makes sense. Does it ever? And the Captain, the Captain's even more somber than before. Three more names to add to a list he shouldn't have to carry. Simon wonders why he hasn't let Inara help him through it yet.

His mei mei is alone, alone with the stars, and he watches her. Pale face turned up towards the black, hands held out as if she wanted to be there and everywhere at once. He thinks she probably could.

A beam stretches across her lips at some footsteps behind him. Not that he sees, or pretends not to at least.

"Thinking you should get to sleep, mei mei. It is late."

"There's no late in the black, Simon," she hugs him, patient tone in her voice. "But I will succumb to sleep. G'night, Captain." Li'l Albatross gives him a smile, knowing he knows and knowing he doesn't want to, yet both figure there's nothing left to do. Hopeless either way, they'd say.

Simon returns to Kaylee's bunk, trying not to go to sleep with the idea and promising he'll talk to Zoe next day, in the morning, when there's no Kaylee so so close, and his heart's not singing for her.


	3. GLUTTONY

**AN: Apologize for the extreme shortness of this...**

**DISCLAIMER: Don't own, no sue. Ok?**

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**3/7·GLUTTONY**

Zoe thinks too, sometimes. When her mind tears itself off Wash, the moment she'd thought her heart had stopped beating. Traitorous thing, intent to keep on going even with no reason to.

River fixes her food sometimes. She stares at the last fresh apple, probably saved for her. She wonders if she's supposed to feel hunger.

Simon and Kaylee she avoids; too much sunshine, too much joy. Jayne ain't been annoying as much, mostly, quiet as not usual, but he's started doing mail runs more often. Mal tries. He tries to understand, tries to be a good Captain. To continue living for those who can't.

Jayne is eating some grub he cooked up, and River peers up from her own bowl of mash up proteins.

"Nausea," she chants. Jayne glances at her, but it's Zoe who dashes out the mess when the smell of his food reaches her. River floats by later, tiny apple on one hand, soothing tea made off herbs from Inara on the other. She smiles.

Zoe thinks, and wonders if that darned husband of hers left her a reason good enough to go on living on his behalf. Hand curls over stomach and she lies back on her, their bed. Mug is gone when she wakes, but apple heart remains.

Zoe thinks, of a small child with his eyes and smile.

Zoe thinks, and smiles.


	4. ENVY

**DISCLAIMER: Own? Currently, not that much. Certainly not these wonderful characters.**

AN: Kaylee, envy? Of course, this would be the perfect example of anti-sin. Or whatever that should be.

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**4/7·ENVY  
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Kaylee dreams.

Most nights it's about Simon, 'n gettin' him to know her folks. Sometimes she relives what they last did in the engine room. There's the other nights, too, when even Simon's arm all wrapped up tight around her don't keep the Reavers away.

Those nights the Cap'n don't come back, 'n she hears River scream from behind closed doors, 'n Simon lies bleeding. He bled so much...

She shivers and wakes up and he's right beside her, all sleepin'. She doesn't talk but kisses him, and he wakes up kissing back.

Kaylee tries not to be selfish: she loves Serenity and everyone on board.

She loves Simon, like somethin' real fierce thumping on her chest.

She loves River as her sweet sweet mei mei, 'n because she knows she and Simon go together. It hurt real bad when she thought her gone 'cause of some faulty blast doors that didn't shut.

Jayne, she loves Jayne, too. He's the mean older brother who'd pick fun at her crushes, but who really takes care of her.

Zoe she loves, always so strong 'n confident, now dull and lost. She's without her Sun.

Inara she thinks of often times, she's a touch more quiet and spending more time in her shuttle. River's with her most times. Her glamorous older sister, so full of everything shiny.

And her Captain, whom Kaylee thinks she could love the most, feels he might need someone to but not anymore. Kaylee, watches, hears, sees her little mei mei with the Cap'n 'n smiles.

And dreams.

"I love my Cap'n," she sighs, 'n catches River's eye 'n winks.

Kaylee's dreams are mostly filled of sweet.


	5. IRE

**DISCLAIMER: Don't own a single thing, 'xcept for the little teeniest tiniest crush on my new English Professor.. but it's on his voice, mostly. Yummy.**

AN: So, so, so sorry I forgot to upload earlier. And reply to the reviews. Been kinda outta my mind (what with starting a new English Course this Monday), so I'm really truly sorry.  
Ire, this chapter, is a bit disjointed at some places, mostly because I wrote it in two separate times (something similar happened with Inara): I'd written a small portion on my computer, then the rest of the story on my cellphone.

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5/7·IRE  
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Jayne fights a lot.

Fought, at first, to survive. Eldest child in a large family, had had to fight hard to get out. Fought to make it out in the big scary black. There was always someone scarier, bigger, stronger. Fought not to grow fond of anything, anyone. He'd thought he'd won.

He'd at least done a far better job at it than any other on board.

Zoe was a ruttin' mess, existing without the little man. Kaylee 'n the doc were practically nauseating. He wondered how Zo' put up with it, at times. 'nara's not whorin' out as much as she used to, 'n Moony hangs 'round her more often. He's stopped callin' her that out loud. Kid's tryin' her hardest and she ain't done crash 'em all dead yet. 's a start. Figures Mattie's 'bout 'er age.

Jayne fought so hard, he knows he's losin'. How could he keep himself from caring 'bout all them women on his ship? 't figures, all of Shepherd's speechifying come back 'round to bite 'im on his muscular buttocks.

"Got me word you've a nice crew of ladies here. Might like some one-on-one time with 'em." Cocky bastard smirks, guns trained on his Captain, his women. Zoe pales, hand set over rounding belly that's not yet noticeable, and River whimpers. It's the whimper that sets him off.

Mal blinks up at him once he's done. He's silent, strong, gun still withdrawn. He can see the Captain's hands shaking. He needn't have worried such. There's no way he'd let any of 'em hun dans hurt any of his crew. His family. Mal nods in acknowledgment, and there's no need for more words.

Captain drops to his knees, checking on his crew. His heart might not be as big, but even it skipped a beat when guns were trained on that tiny slip of a girl. He coulda sworn Cap gained another whole 10 years at that sight.

Jayne had thought maybe there'd be a time for him an' crazy, but things worked out differently. He's not the one she's been makin' sweet eyes to, an' that's just fine. Ain't likely he could find one woman to settle with, 'n that'd just complicate things. He's not keen on leavin' Serenity now.

Jayne fights a lot, but now most of his fighting is for Serenity an' the rest of his family. He figures he ain't never been one for lost causes. Shepherd'be proud, he thinks, as he says a prayer at night.

Comes a time, man's gotta stand up 'n fight for his own. 'n Jayne plans to fight.


	6. PRIDE

**DISCLAIMER: Own nothing. Maybe my collection of books I bought with my own money?  
AN: Sorry it took long. Dad at the hospital, so in no mood to make up excuses. Love.**

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****6/7·PRIDE  
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Inara knows. More than they'd probably like her to, anyways.

River's visits have grown more frequent over time, specially since Miranda, and she doesn't the heart to shut her out. Girl means well, she's confused, but it's not something she has control over.

Inara knows River knows, and there's no way around it. The words are never uttered, but River questions and Inara chooses answers.

She is well aware that River might set her plans askew, but knows very well she won't.

Inara plans to go quietly, and River compares her to a shooting star. Inara tries not to think through, knows it was just a compliment.

She realizes much more than she lets on, seeing as there are still a few secrets to be kept.

She knows Zoe will become one again, soon, once she works up the courage to ask Simon for a blood test, to be completely certain, for something they all already suspect, and most likely know. Even if part of her already believes, too.

She knows, too, that Jayne won't be leaving Serenity anymore. He's safe, he feels he has a family, and he's grown to care for the others.

Kaylee and Simon will get married, soon, when he works up the courage. She saw him buy the ring, and he'd enlisted River's help to keep Kaylee occupied. There's little River keeps from her nowadays.

She's aware, too, that Simon's been saving ever since to be able to afford a trip to Kaylee's home. He needs her father's permission, first, and he'll ask for Mal's once he tells him of his plan.

She knows as well that Kaylee's blissfully unaware. She plans to get married, sure, but never expected him to be planning on it already.

She knows of Mal, so confused inside. He's glad she stayed, and part of him wonders why he's not happier, why he didn't ask her not to leave on the first place.

"Pieces don't fit anymore. Will you hate me?" River doubts, eyes trained on her. Inara smiles and calls her mei mei and asks to brush her hair.

She knows she could never hate River, and is somewhat glad for both of them.

"Won't be soon," she adds, eyes closed at the gentle feel of the brush.

"Then you'll need lots of patience, mei mei. He's a very stubborn man."

They giggle in company, a sound so sweet she knows it draws Mal to the door. River smiles instinctively, eyes still shut. A beat passes before she opens her eyes and he gathers himself to move away.

Inara knows she shouldn't be happy for them, part of her bleeds at the thought. But Inara knows, and knows River won't say, that them white lies are only for her own benefit. She chooses to believe.

Inara knows they'll find each other soon, and knows she'll become only a pleasant memory amongst the crew. She knows all this when River begins bringing her tea to bed, early in the morning, and starts making plans.

Just as she knows them to be right for each other, she knows she wouldn't stand to see it. River knows, too, and thus keeps quiet.

Inara knows she'll be making a one-way trip soon, and she knows it'd be best to do it on her own.


	7. GREED

**AN: So, we've reached an ending. 7th, and final part, on this story. After 16 reviews, 2,053 hits, 4 favs and 8 alerts, I feel really really really accomplished.  
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**DISCLAIMER: Own nothing. Only my thoughts.**

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7/7·GREED  
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Mal believes.

He's grateful for a lot of things. He's got a solid ship beneath his feet, a crew to rely on and miles and miles of space ahead. Sure, he blames the man up there for all of his losses, but he's indeed grateful he's still got such loyal people to fall back on.

Shepherd Book had asked him to believe in something. He can say he finally does.

He believes in Serenity, his home, his family, his heart. His everything. He believes in each and every one of his crew. He mourns, it's much obvious he does, Book and Wash and even Mr. Universe hang over his head.

Fortunately, he's found something to believe in.

Zoe, for example, and the little human form she's carrying. River's made that abundantly clear, even if Zoe ain't said it out loud just yet.

Jayne's proven himself to be much trustworthy: he believes the man has found a home, and a family. More importantly, he's accepted it.

Kaylee and Simon, he hopes, will start sharing some of their sunshine. He believes they will, soon, or he'll have to start banning them from common areas.

He used to believe he had a future with Inara, but now sees bags, boxes packed again and he finds himself unsure. Something's changed, the reason is him, and he ain't exactly sure if he ought to be glad. Inara don't seem to mind, she only smiles, and he wonders if she believes the same. He believes she won't be comin' back this time.

"Storm's getting worse," he breathes, eyes fixed on the front.

"We'll pass through it soon enough," she echoes, and it only startles him a bit. He smiles, it's hard not to, and feels the wrinkles form on the side of his eyes. She's so young... A part of him breaks for her.

She's given him a reason to believe, nothing more than a broken child, shaped as a fancy weapon, then sought after 'cause she was better 'n they'd expected. Mal's found he believes in much more 'n he would've ever expected to. He still holds his oldest beliefs close to him.

Mal believes, knows, they will rise again. And, when his eyes meet hers, he truly believes she'll be by his side when the time comes.

Mal believes he'd like her to be there.


End file.
